Slut-Shaming and Gender Bias

I love the website Jezebel and the feminist perspective that it provides on a lot of pop culture things and current events.  I do not necessarily always agree with the writer's perspective, but I welcome discourse and debate.

Tonight on my Twitter feed this story came up, I clicked on it, and my heart broke.  To sum it up, a teenage female committed suicide by jumping in front of a subway care because she was being bullied non-stop in school for being a "slut." Apparently she had had sex with four members of the football team at the same time at a party and was being harassed about it ever since. Not cool for so many reasons.

I'm not saying that I condone this behavior.  This teenager was only 15 years old.  It troubles me that she thought that having sex with four males at the same time was something she should/could do and something that is acceptable of a female her age. But you have to take a step back and ask yourself where she even got this idea.  Why did she think this was something that she should/could do? I blame the media. The perpetuation and objectification of women in the media.  The portrayal of teenage sex with no consequence. The idea that this type of sexual behavior is the norm for people of that age. However, this is not my main issue with all of this.

What would the students' reaction have been if it had been a male who had had sex with four females at the same time? I can almost guarantee that he would not have been bullied. His buddies would have given him and high five. He would have been revered for his sexual prowess. He would not have been called a slut.

There is such a double standard for women in our society. We do an activity with our Comm 210 students when we teach language where they make a list of all of the terms they know for sexually active males and all of the terms they know for sexually active males. Almost always the female list is longer than the male list and the terms on the female list have a negative connotation whereas the male list has a positive connotation. Why? Why is it so okay for men to be promiscuous but not for women? Why does society hold women to a different sexual standard? Why was this female bullied for this to the point where she felt her only out was death, and the four other males who participated in this with her were the main culprits of this bullying?

This is a problem! Bullying is a problem. Our gender biased society is a problem. Our failure to acknowledge the double standard that exists is a problem. How can the behavior of these four football players be excused? Who is going to be held accountable?

Teenagers are brutal.  You could not pay me all of the money in the world to go back to the awkward years of middle school and early high school. They were the worst. Schools need to step up and take responsibility for their students. Community needs to be promoted. Critical thinking needs to happen, and things like the gender binary that exists needs to be challenged. Tragic events like this cannot and should not pass under our radar.